the camp post

(Here's a picture of a sign that really doesn't go with the post.)

My mom asked me if she thought my time at camp helped me grow in my faith at all. I told her I don't know. Time will tell. But one thing I do (know): forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (That's part of our staff verse. Philippians 3:12-14. That's also not what I was going to say, but I couldn't get it out of my mind so yeah.)
But one thing I do know: camp this summer pointed out my weaknesses. Those would be impatience, worrying (not trusting God), and not loving the unlovable when I need to. So now I just need to remember to apply what I've learned instead of forgetting about it. I guess that goes with the whole pressing on thing, doesn't it?
Moving on...
To start from the beginning, I was supposed to work in the kitchen (where I was comfortable) this summer, except for one week. That week I was going to be on counseling staff (scary. Very scary). Somehow, though, I ended up being on counseling staff for the whole summer. (Well, all of the weeks I worked at camp, that is.) It was a challenge, but a good one.
There was one thought that kept coming back to me all summer: everyone is unique. After the first week, I wondered who would be the (*picks random name*) Stacey of next week. Who would be the Jane? But when the next week rolled around, there wasn't a Stacey- or Jane-like personality. There were different personalities, none the same. There was a Suzanne, but no Stacey. A Gabby, but not a Jane. Realizing that we're all unique, different, and special was a new way of seeing things for me, and it was beautiful.
I also realized how wonderful kids are, but that I don't really want to be a mother of a whole cabin-full of them.
Another point:
When I went to camp, I was a bit frustrated. I knew I wasn't going to have very much time to write, which I absolutely love doing. Even when I did have time, I didn't know how much of that time I'd want to spend writing. I'd want to catch up with God, or myself, or some of the staff. So while I wanted writing to be a priority this summer, I knew it wouldn't be, and it wasn't. Looking back on those five-and-a-half weeks, though, I know it was a good thing I didn't write a lot. The break was nice. It probably did me good. But now that camp is over, I've started up again. I'm very glad I'm back home with my characters. I missed them.
(Maybe) the last point.
Camp brought out my fun side. I have it. It's always been there, but it's been suppressed when I'm around strangers. Even though I was around a lot of strangers this summer, my fun side was forced out. You have to be enthusiastic around the campers. If I'm down and "boring," that can affect them. If they don't want to play the camp game, with how much more of a grudging attitude will they play if I'm not enthusiastic? (It's pretty hard to not be enthusiastic about the games, though. They're usually fun. But you get my point.)
And I'm not saying that I'm boring and grumpy, because I'm not. Although I think I know some people who would probably disagree with that. And sometimes I am grumpy and "boring." But the whole "boring" thing frustrates me because we all have our own definition of it. That's a completely different discussion for another time, though. Anyway, I'm not perfect, and I don't even know where this is going. So have a nice day and I'm terribly sorry for the all-over-the-placeness of this post, plus anything confusing.
♥
Bekah Joan