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Maybe I should just shut up.

I keep telling God that I feel sad and that I don't understand and that his death might give me something to look forward to but right now sucks.
But then I think I should just shut up because somewhere, he's whispering his grace to me. His forgiveness encircles the mess I've become and the mess I've made. And somehow I'll become a blossoming rose instead of an ugly thorn. Somehow.
Sometimes life just doesn't feel very nice, and when that happens, I have a tendency to hurt myself. My wrists bleed from the harsh things I snap at myself. Bruises decorate my neck from where I've strangled all of the good thoughts until they withered away.
But his grace is always there, whispering, waiting.
So here's to shutting up and listening.



  1. Aw, I'm so sorry to hear that, Rebekah! But that's is such an optimistic outlook-- so inspiring! :)

  2. Your earthly parents would not like you saying "shut up" - even if only to yourself. How much more does God not like this. He says "Be still and know that I am God". Quite a bit gentler, huh?

    Why are we so harsh on ourselves (and I include myself in this)? All this snapping and strangling and "shut up"-ing? Jesus, our example, was firm for sure, but He was not mean. Follow His advise - "Be still".

    1. Aw, gee, Miss Barb. You went and made me cry. Thank you for your encouraging words. <3

  3. *hugs* I know how that feels. Life is hard, but my dear, dont hurt yourself physically or emotionally. you are loved. dont believe the lies that the devil tells you, or even the lies you tell yourself. its okay to feel things; allow yourself to hurt and to cry and to feel sorrow and pain; but be comforted in knowing that "this too shall pass." your pain wont last forever. and you're not alone in your struggles. I'm here for you, and God is there for you, and so are many others. you have personal friends and family as well as a family here on blogger.

    Stay strong gorgeous. you are worth it<3

  4. This reminds me of Job 6:24~ "Teach me, and I will be silent. Make me understand how I have gone astray." It was in the middle of his trials, right after his "friends" came along and told him that God had hated him and how he should give up and worship something else. But, Job held fast, and in the end was alright.

    We're in the midst of trials a lot, but it doesn't come without hope. God's always got your back, even when times are tough. Pray, try to find the right way, and trust Him. I'll be praying for you! <3

  5. 1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you."

    Hi Rebekah! Praying for you. Feel better! :)


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